The Quickening (Not a Horror Movie, I Swear)

A few weeks ago, lying in bed drifting off to sleep with my hand on my belly hoping against hope for some sign that the baby was still alive in there, the thought occurred to me that once the kid starts kicking, he or she (hopefully) won't stop. Drowsily, I wondered if that would be annoying. But it'll probably be balanced out by how cute it is, right?

Well, I am here to tell you that our baby has started kicking me. It is indeed highly reassuring and adorable. It is also at times distracting and, yes, just a wee bit annoying. (Sorry, unborn child! I really do love you a whole lot, I promise. It would just be easier to concentrate on work if we could coordinate a bit when you decide to dance a jig. For instance, while I'm sitting at my desk responding to emails - fine. In the middle of giving a PowerPoint presentation - less helpful.) Yes, I know that it's way more distracting to have a screaming baby on my hip than feel a few wriggles in my belly, but I don't intend to give many work presentations while holding our child once he/she emerges into the world... at least, that's the plan! I'm getting visions of Diane Keaton at the beginning of Baby Boom when she brings her daughter to the office and hilarity ensues.

What does it feel like? Good question. I would say it's one of those things that you'll just know when it happens to you, but that's totally a lie. The first time I felt something weird in my belly that was remotely distinguishable from gas bubbles or other general digestive activity was early in the morning at 18w3d. It was before I had eaten anything and there was nothing else going on besides - tap. Tap tap. Hmm, I thought. Nothing happened at 18w4d, but at 18w5d in the middle of the afternoon I felt the same sort of tapping. It happened briefly and then disappeared. 18w6d I made a strategic mistake and ate a buffalo chicken sandwich for lunch; any tapping the rest of the day was rather obscured by the heartburn and general gastrointestinal protest that followed. But 19w0d was full of activity. Tap tap tap. Pause. Tap tap. Pause. Wriggle. Pause. Tap wriggle tap tap.

The other thing that made me think it was the baby moving was the location. At this point, my uterus is a pretty darn obvious structure within my belly, especially when I lie down. And this is the only part of my story that does come close to suggesting a horror movie (since I think we can all agree that "The Quickening" would make a great title) - the taps and wriggles were coming from inside the uterus! And then they turned on the radio and heard about an escaped serial killer and they found a hook on the door handle! But no, seriously, it's hard to ignore this giant thing in my body that's making me resign myself to wearing only maternity clothes from here on out. And when that thing starts moving a bit, it's hard to miss.

So there you have it! Now, instead of wondering appointment to appointment if the baby has died, I get to wonder every few hours "Hmm, is it still alive in there? When was the last time I felt anything?" But I'm still really glad that we've passed this milestone, right around the time I would have expected it. Strong work, baby! Keep it up!