5 Things I Didn't Expect About Labor, Delivery, and the Postpartum Period

Little O is almost a month old - I'm so proud of him for thriving, and us for surviving! He's packing on weight like a champ and we're getting better at keeping our household functioning with a newborn as its newest member.

Before the memories fade, I wanted to write down some of the most surprising things about my birth experience in case they're helpful to someone else (or in case I choose to do this again - but that's a different story!)

1. Braxton-Hicks contractions vs. real contractions. 
For most of the pregnancy, I felt not-quite-painless Braxton-Hicks contractions at least once a day. Toward the end of the third trimester, they were very frequent (but never regular, usually coming in clusters a few minutes apart and then easing up for an hour or two.) I spent more time than I'd like to admit looking up phrases on Google like "distinguish braxton-hicks contractions labor" since I was constantly convinced I was about to go into preterm labor. One of the things I read often was that Braxton-Hicks contractions feel like they start low in your uterus and then sweep upwards, but real labor contractions wrap around from your back to your front, or sometimes they seem to move from the top down. As I've written previously, once I felt my first real contraction I realized how different they were, but only in terms of the pain associated with them - every single labor contraction I had went from the lowest part of my uterus up to the top, just like the Braxton-Hicks. They were, however, much more painful and felt very similar to menstrual cramps. If you're trying to make the distinction on your own, I would say that the way you perceive the tightness starting is not the way to go.

2. "You're so tall, maybe that's why the epidural isn't working."
I was pretty clear with all of my caregivers before and during my labor that I wanted an epidural. And I got it, too, which I greatly appreciated. However, several times while trying to fix the window in the lower left quadrant of my belly, the nurses and anesthesiologists remarked that maybe it wasn't working correctly because I was so tall. Huh? For the record, I'm 5'8" (about 173 cm for you metric folks.) I'm tall, but not that tall! I can't imagine I'm the tallest woman who has ever given birth at this hospital, but who knows. Besides, there are lots of risk factors for why the epidural might have been incomplete at first, and it's a common problem that often has a simple solution. In any event, after lots of fiddling and a bolus or two of extra meds, the numbness did spread over my entire contracting belly and I was a much happier mother-to-be. Bottom line: if you find yourself with an incomplete epidural, don't give up - ask for them to do whatever they can to fix it.

3. Careful with that bassinet!
Well, duh, I don't want to drop my precious bundle of joy. Then why is the bassinet so high, and my hospital bed is so low? Once the excitement from the birth had settled down and O and I were moved to a postpartum room, the nurses got me into a nice cushy hospital bed and put O right next to me in what is, let's face it, a modified refrigerator crisper drawer on wheels. Since the nurses and doctors would stand when they checked out O, it made sense for him to be nice and high (think the height of a kitchen counter). And since I struggled a bit getting in and out of bed, it made sense for me to be nice and low. But when I needed to pick up O, things got a bit tricky. I couldn't reach over to get him while still in bed, so I had to either stand up and walk around to the bassinet to fetch him or get up on my knees rather awkwardly while still on the mattress. I tried putting my own bed up as high as it would go, but the nurse got upset at this and came in to lower it because she said I could injure myself trying to get down from there (which, yeah I could, but who would you rather see in a heap on the floor, me or the baby?!) Next time I do this, I'm asking someone to hand the baby to me each and every time, because there's just no good way to get him or her from the bassinet to my arms when I'm by myself.

4. Headlights
Prior to giving birth, I hit up my local maternity store for a nice pretty nightgown that I could wear during my hospital stay since I knew we'd have visitors. I did not, however, pack a nice pretty bra to go with it! I guess that when an infant is spending hours each day sucking on your nipples, they don't exactly go back to their innocuous, soft, no-bra-necessary selves between nursing sessions. Seriously, I looked like I was cold the entire time! I had a sleep bra with me that consisted of a nice, comfy single layer of fabric, but that wasn't enough to preserve my modesty when friends and family started stopping by. Underwires and padded cups are the only way to go, as far as I'm concerned.

5. The sweaty, sweaty night sweats. 
Things were so weird in the hospital that it was hard to tell what was normal and what wasn't, but once I got home, I noticed that during the (very short) times that I slept, I would sweat like crazy. Remember when I was in menopause for a few weeks last winter? It was like that! I thought I was imagining things until I read Mo's post about the same thing, and it turns out that it's a common occurrence after giving birth. Honestly, it wasn't too bothersome (not getting more than 2 hours of sleep in a row was a bigger problem) but it did make it even harder to stay hydrated, which is important for breastfeeding. Keep a glass of water nearby and get ready to do even more laundry than usual, and take heart that it should end soon - for me, it was only about 3 weeks and now I'm back to normal.

Normal... what a crazy idea. Having a baby means embracing the new normal, that's for sure. But I'm saving that for another post!